State of mind..!!

- "Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that’s not true. Some smaller countries are neutral."

- "One of life’s mysteries is how a two-pound box of candy can make a person gain five-pounds."

- Wanna be my Chammak Challo – oooh ooh oh

PS: The quotes aren’t mine but they represent the state of my mind. Exactly. Literally. To the point. Not necessarily in that order though!

*Randomly wandering mind

In the moment..!!

I look at you

An emotion overpowers me

And in the moment

I let myself be

My Being is defined

Around You

To you, I owe

Everything there is and could be

And yet in the cacophony

I hear nothing

The sleep eludes me

The time betrays me

I put my faith

And it erodes me

And in the moment

I let myself be

You are the Creator

The Master

My strong believer

And yet in your eyes

I don’t see me

You are my quintessential necessity

But in the hour of need

You ignore me

I look upto you

And feel complete

My emotions overwhelm me

You are to me

What they’ll ever be

A reason to trust

But be just

A reason to thrive

But survive

And in that moment

I’ll let myself be

 

 

Relationship 101..!!

It’s strange the way relationships mold across the span of our lives. You either grow in a relationship or grow out of them. In life, you create this need for relationships. It’s basically for sustenance. On an average, at any given point, you have a few relationships to foster. Now that’s a different story, some of them become acquaintances in the near future. Relationships give us a reason to live. To love. To prosper. To exist.  And to feel complete.

When a relationship ends, it leaves a vacuum which needs to be filled. To fill that hole is when we start finding solace in the spoken words around. It’s the mind’s way of conditioning itself for the lack of something. It is human nature to keep looking for the ultimate reason of being one with another. It is this need for existence is what creates dependence on relationships. And we complete the cycle.

As much as we’d like to hang onto some relationships, they seldom stay the same. People change. Needs change. Priorities change. Time changes everything. And it is when you outgrow the relationship is when it irks you the most. But I guess the law of nature forces you to keep moving ahead and create new connections. Connections with meaning and depth. A  fresh new beginning with pizzazz!

My Fervent Admirer..!!

I am the mirror

Of my soul’s reflection

Enthralled by my esprit

Are thousands of men

Flocking my heart’s corridor

Desiring my company every hour

I am the enchantress

And their raison de’etre

Night and day

They pine for me

Their eyes knit those furtive dreams

Oblivion to self and unknowingly

They now belong to me

I am the black

And the white

End of the dark

Towards the light

I am the beauty behind the veil

Food for their famished soul

Controlling their every reverie

In this world of glitterati

I am the last flicker of flame

For their tainted self

I am an illusion

And I am real

There are no ground rules

There is no magic spell

There are no tricks

As I am The Dominatrix

I am who I am

The mirror of my soul’s reflection

The charmer

And my very own

Fervent Admirer



* Random lines. Randomness personified!

The Paso Doble of my Life..!!

The thing about Yesterday is that it won’t come back. No matter how hard we try and how desperate we are to turn back the time. And then there is Today, which can never catch up with Tomorrow. No matter how badly we want to fast forward our life into the future.

So what we are left with is Today. Now. This moment. Seize it. Carpe Diem.

This is exactly what I have been trying to do. My daughter is now more than a year old but seems only like yesterday when she was born. It’s been a memorable journey so far. Parenthood has been quite a learning experience. I have learnt by heart now that the only thing constant in my life is change. There hasn’t been a single day which is a replica of a day previous. Each day brings new excitement and adventures to my otherwise chaotic and dull life. I have found new meaning in being one with my daughter. She is indeed the silver lining in our otherwise cloudy life.

I have been trying hard to stop her from growing up so fast but its inevitable. And only thing I can do is just capture these moments. Make these memories to cherish them for lifelong. Even though you can never get your childhood back, they say you relive it through your child. Those exciting first moments of independence – rolling, sitting, solid feeding, crawling, cruising, walking, babbling - are more for the parents to take pride in. We have been fortunate enough to watch her toddle around the house and create special moments for us. She is the dance of my life. Makes me tough and soft all at the same time. Ergo, nothing defines her better than the Paso Doble! 

* I haven’t written in so long I realize it now than before. And the itch to write is slowly returning back. So, hopefully, I’ll get back in form by the end of this year. That’s only if I keep writing!